9 Things Only Shoe Obsessed People Understand
Do you laugh at dilettantes who can’t spell Christian Louboutin? Shopping doesn’t make any sense if you didn’t buy at least one pair of shoes? You get personally offended by people wearing monstrous shoes or thinking that one or two pairs of footwear is enough. Carrie Bradshaw is your spirit animal? Congrats, you are a shoe junkie. If you wanna make sure of it here is a list of things you’ve probably experienced at one point or another.
1. You consciously tried to squeeze your feet into a pair of discount drop-dead-classy Manolo Blahniks that are one size too small…and you nailed it. Moreover, you bought those puppies, even though you can’t feel your feet walking in them. You’ve made this mistake more than a dozen of times, and you do not regret buying those never-ending pairs of shoes that are meant to be placed in your closet till the time you’d drop a couple of foot sizes.
2. If you had a dollar every time people asked you ‘Do you really need another pair of shoes, you already have almost the same pair”, you would be able to build your own shoe empire. Seriously, just roll your eyes and show those shoe threats how it’s done.
3. You could never get enough pairs of black boots and you can fiercely defend every pair ‘cause they look completely different. Moreover, these cuties even match your personality.
4. You have nothing left to do but ask your BF to move out and turn a spare room into a walk-in shoe closet. And you don’t care if you show more affection toward your footwear, unconditional love means putting others first, in this case it’s about shoes, OK?
5. You’d prefer to die rather than admit to shoe pain. And NO, there’s no need to bring an extra pair of flats just in case, cause no matter what you’ll never take those fabulous heels off. Only a high heel junkie can totally get it.
6. You have more images of your shoe goals than selfies saved in your phone. Those who have a penchant for footwear are not really interested in taking selfies.
7. You literally can’t get those $1.000 sexy Miu Miu platforms out of your head. You foam at the mouth just imagining yourself rocking the streets wearing such treasures. Your eternal struggles will drive you crazy unless you break the bank and satisfy your soul with buying those.
8. You hate public transportation because you go bananas if something like this happens. Seriously, stay away from my shoes.
9. You keep all of your babies in perfect condition, and there is nothing more unfair than to pick a pair in the morning. You like to comfort your relatives with an excuse that at least you are not addicted to cocaine. I kid. I kid.